Integrity
The Feeling We Can’t Fake
As I was rereading my last piece (for paid subscribers), one thought kept returning: integrity is a particularly timely subject because so many of us feel exhausted by what we see around us in institutions, media, politics, business, and sometimes even within our own families. Yet most discussions of integrity stay focused on judging others.
Today’s perspective offers something different.
To me, we need to get back to the only place where real power exists: our own consciousness, choices, and alignment. It fits beautifully with our Wisdom Path theme for 2026. A great question here is, “Where can I bring myself into greater integrity today?”
Most of us don’t wake up one morning and decide to betray ourselves. It happens slowly. It’s a promise we make but don’t keep. A truth we know but don’t speak. A boundary we need but don’t honor. A feeling we push aside because it is inconvenient.
One small compromise at a time.
And yet, even before consequences appear in the outer world, something inside us knows. We can feel it. The body tightens. The nervous system becomes less settled. Sleep becomes a little more difficult.
Joy feels slightly out of reach. Our energy leaks away in ways we cannot quite explain.
Integrity is often described as honesty, morality, or doing the right thing. While those are certainly aspects of it, I’ve come to see integrity more simply.
Integrity is wholeness. It is when what we think, what we feel, and what we do are aligned. It is when our inner truth and our outer life are moving in the same direction. And when they aren’t, we feel the friction.
How Integrity Feels
When we’re out of integrity, life often feels heavier than it needs to. We may feel scattered, drained, resentful, anxious, or stuck.
Sometimes we become defensive. Sometimes we blame others. Sometimes we distract ourselves with busyness, entertainment, food, shopping, or endless scrolling.
The symptoms vary, but the signal is the same: Something inside us is asking to come back into alignment.
By contrast, integrity has a different feeling altogether.
It feels spacious.
Grounded.
Clear.
Even when life is challenging.
Integrity doesn’t guarantee comfort. Sometimes living in integrity requires difficult conversations, unpopular decisions, or significant change.
Yet there is a peace that accompanies it. Our nervous systems relax because they are no longer carrying the burden of pretending.
Integrity in Relationships
Every marriage, friendship, and family system depends upon trust. Trust isn’t built by perfection. It is built by congruence.
When our words and actions match, trust grows.
When they repeatedly diverge, trust erodes.
A marriage may survive many hardships, but it struggles when one or both partners continually say one thing and do another. The same is true for friendships.
And perhaps most importantly, it is true for our relationship with ourselves. Each time we break a promise to ourselves, we weaken self-trust.
Each time we honor a promise, no matter how small, we strengthen it.
Integrity in Community
Communities thrive when people contribute what they genuinely can, speak honestly, and take responsibility for their actions.
Communities fracture when blame replaces accountability.
When appearances become more important than authenticity.
When individuals expect others to embody values they themselves are unwilling to practice.
The health of any community is largely determined by the collective integrity of its individuals.
Integrity in Politics
It is easy to point fingers at politicians, but far harder to recognize that political systems often mirror the consciousness of the societies that create them.
When integrity declines in a culture, trust declines. Division increases. People become cynical because they no longer believe words mean what they say.
The solution is not merely finding better leaders. The solution begins when each of us becomes a better steward of our own integrity.
Every act of alignment contributes to the larger field.
A Simple Integrity Practice
If you’d like to strengthen your own integrity this week, try this simple exercise.
Each evening, ask yourself three questions:
1. Where was I fully aligned today?
2. Where did I ignore something I knew to be true?
3. What is one small action I can take tomorrow to bring myself back into greater alignment?
Not ten actions.
Not a complete life overhaul.
One action.
One conversation.
One promise kept.
One truth acknowledged.
Integrity grows the same way a mighty oak grows: one ring at a time.
Anyway, that’s how I grow mine. Am I perfect? No. Am I aware? Yes.
The Quiet Wealth of Integrity
We live in a world that celebrates visible forms of wealth.
Money.
Status.
Recognition.
Influence.
Yet integrity creates a kind of wealth the world cannot give and cannot take away.
It creates inner stability.
Self-respect.
Trust.
Peace.
And perhaps most importantly, it allows us to look in the mirror and know that the person looking back is someone we can rely upon.
In uncertain times, that may be one of the greatest treasures we can cultivate.
Love is not merely something we feel.
Love is something we embody.
And integrity is one of the ways Love takes form in the world.
With love and integrity,
Kaye
Such incredible insights. Thank you 💕
Integrity is your soul.